of the scoundrel and thief, Henri Charriere, hits home for me in one scene;
that moment in which, for attempting escape, he's held in solitary confinement to the point of death from starvationand hallucinates the walk on the lonely road, in an endless desert. Before him appears an incarnation of judgment and he is sentenced for the crime of a wasted life.
The irony of the constant attempt to escape certain death, at the risk of death, to certain damnation, has always bothered me. Although sentenced to Devils Island (an effective and appropriate backdrop) for murder, he was apparently only guilty of a lifetime of selfishness; that is, keeping for himself what was a great heart, to have his humanity ruined by constant grappling with the shadows of quiet desperation. His capacity for the gifts of love to the world squandered in repeated vain attempts to escape from himself.
In my own moments of quiet desperation, the search for a perfect understanding of my purpose in this life, at this time, has often crippled the answers apparent.
When walking along the beach looking for the perfect shell it's easy to be disappointed and give up, because for the most part they are all broken and worn and seemingly worthless. Upon closer inspection however, the obvious beauty and individuality of the survivors of the oceans constant beating stands out, and the unpremeditated art of nature becomes astoundingly apparent.
It has occurred to me that it is the same with human beings, with their struggles against the unstoppable currents and pounding waves of the great ocean of the universe. In the shadows of their personalities and with their physical and emotional scars is the potential for a perfect balance of mercy and acceptance. In their vulnerability and weakness is their key for a greater understanding of their place in the equation, and what part of their heart belongs to the world, and then what it means to escape to instead of from. In effect, in imperfection lies perfection, and the unspeakable name of the ONE called simply 'I Am that I Am' speaks to our collective hearts.
It is worth a quiet ponder don't you think?
Jan. 1, 186- Had an awful time in school today. me and Cawcaw Harding set together. when we came in from resess Cawcaw reached over and hit me a bat, and i lent him one in the snoot, and he hit me back. we was jest fooling, but old Francis called Cawcaw up front to lick him. i thought if i went up and told him he wood say, noble boy go to your seat, i wont lick neether of you. anyway i knew that Cawcaw wood tell on me, and so i told old Francis i hit Cawcaw first, and old Francis said Harry i have had my eye on you for a long time, and he jest took us up and slammed us together, and then he wood put me down and shake Cawcaw and then he wood put Cawcaw down and shake me till my head wabbled and he turned me upside down and all the fellers looked upside down and went round and round and somehow i felt silly like and kind of like laffin. i dident want to laff but coodent help it. and then he talked to us and sent us to our seats and told us to study, and i tried to but all the words in the book went round and round and i felt awful funny and kind of wabbly, and when i went home mother said something was the matter and i told her and then i cried, i don't know what i cried for, becaus i dident ake any. father said he wood lick me at home when i got licked at school and perhaps that was why i cried. ennyway when father come home i asked him if he was a going to lick me and he said not by a dam sight, and he gave me ten cents and when i went to bed i got laffin and crying all to once, and coodent stop, and mother set in my room and kept her hand on my forred until i went to sleep. i drempt i was fiting all the time. when i get big enuf there is going to be a fite between me and old Francis, you see if there aint.
Thread is made from a wide variety of materials. Where a thread is stronger than the material that it is being used to join, if seams are placed under strain the material may tear before the thread breaks. Garments are usually sewn with threads of lesser strength than the fabric so that if stressed the seam will break before the garment. Heavy goods that must withstand considerable stresses such as upholstery, car seating, tarpaulins, tents, and saddlery require very strong threads. Attempting repairs with light weight thread will usually result in rapid failure, though again, using a thread that is stronger than the material being sewn can end up causing rips in that material before the thread itself gives way.